dude, she masturbates with a ken doll.
I kept feeling my boobs..just to make sure they were still there.
how did he go about obtaining bull sperm?
I'm telling you the guy came in bought a box of condoms and all three of the chicks that came in behind him followed him to his car. I want his life
Just croosed over that too drunk for chemistry class line
Im in Ft Meyers right now looking right at an alligator. I have had a couple of beers and people are telling me not to feed him but Im gonna do it anyway.
Well idk about you but my nose is all recovered for the weekend.
i actually pissed myself from laughing when I saw the old man in lingerie carrying a spiderman purse. I dont know if he was real or if it was the tequila, but my head hurts.
I told you I'm not going to the Phillies game until we're tripping balls
The perfect world is just rainbows and rocknroll and good sex. With the occasional stripper ridIng a horse. I spelled occasionally right?
the fat lady is now rubbing her stomach and staring at me. I hate trains
I woke up with your vibrator in my face
I'm glad our friendship can withstand laughing mid-blowjob during the diarrhea scene in Dumb & Dumber.
Oh. So it is a cult
Basically. But a nice cult. They eat muffins and talk about fundraising.
If my life today were a movie the subtitle would be: Revenge of the Beer Shits
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