She is totally STD
Is it a bad omen that my phone auto corrects dtf to STD
She might as well just lie down with one of those red "Easy Buttons" next to her
threw up in my backpack again. Asian guy I cheat from wasn't pleased.
Still can't believe they give people like us a drivers license and college degree.
I'm gonna have to get you a special blowjob bib -- like a lobster bib -- but instead of a picture of a little red lobster, it will have a picture of a penis, with 3 big squirts coming out.
I have just been informed that my company has ray guns. I WORK FOR ACTUAL BOND VILLAINS. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
It took years to build this empire of casual fuckings and not carings.
If I had a vagina, my apartment would have been the Atlantic
Is it too soon for me to wonder what sex with him would be like?
I feel like I should be having more sex dreams of my boyfriend than his sister..
masturbating on the freeway is more stressful than it sounds
I basically go to him for great dick and great memes.
i feel like every weekend turns into a giant blur of i dont want to know...
look im sitting on my bathroom floor in my underwear snorting cocaine can we talk about this later
Let me set the mood for you. Do you remember Britney Spears in her Hit Me Baby One More Time era? Well I just fucked this college girl I shit you not her name is Persephone and she looks exactly like Britney Spears back when she was hot. I might be in love.
Randomize
