Situation: He got it in my eye, how long do I let it sting before should start to worry?
We should write a comic book about the many adventures of your vagina. Maybe even give it a cape or something.
He jizzed my face. I had to ask for a washcloth. He ran his underwear under the water and handed them to me. Not so romantic.
Ah, I knew it wouldn't be long before my boobs were introduced into the conversation.
I think I just need to get a pillow shaped like a toilet seat.
coming from the girl bound and determined to pee in the snow
why would you restrict a girl of that
what's the name of that soccar player i bit again?
He left his own bachelor party to bring me weed. Then smoked with me. Tell me I'm not his favorite-ex-friends-with-benefits.
Just saw the guy I slept with last night in a bar. He gave me a high five and kept moving
These cutoffs are too tight but my ass looks like Freedom
I was sending him tit pics while watching how to train your dragon 2. It was everything.
Some how my underwear was hanging from the antlers of a antelope head on the wall of the hotel........
I tried to bring you in when you passed out on the porch but all you said was that I "ruined your hope ands dreams of becoming an astronaut"
4 pharmacies and not one had Plan B. If this is gods way of telling me it's time for a child, he can fuck off.
She was screaming and crying about how she couldn't find her middle finger. Then, she threw her body on to the pavement. Thats the last time we buy a freshmen a handle.
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