i've alrwady decidided boys hate me plkease take notyes.
what
nvm
Sweater Vest, Chin Strap, Beard, sporting a white Beret- Please don't ever let me be THAT guy.
Oh i know my limit. 9 shots after i've given blood.
don't worry dude, we didn't fuck on your bed out of respect for you
couldn't find a condom?
basically
I should do something nice for her. Like sign her up for "What Not To Wear."
I tried telling the cop that I don't do drugs, and that if he'd just take me home I could prove it by showing him my D.A.R.E. certificate.
He might have if you were a little more subtle about your feelings instead of telling everyone multiple times how much you wanted his dick
Also, if you all get arrested i'm coming to laugh at you because i don't have the money for bail.
We've only been here for 15 hours and our names are already on 2 separate police reports. We've also been given our "final warning" by the cops and hotel management.
I WAS CONCIEVED IN THE BACK OF MY CAR. THATS HOW OLD THIS CAR IS.
...how and why.
PARENTS ARE MAGIC.
Tell her this is the Disneyland of penises.It's a magical place everyone should visit once in their life.
My knees are skinned from sitting on someone's face on concrete
I just gotta say that I feel so much better now that I got some. I mean I feel like a normal functioning adult ready to contribute to society.
i just passed i guy i once let listen to me masterbate on the phone...nyc is not big enough
Your parents are gone and we haven't fucked in their bed... why?
Randomize
