you know you are hungover when... you set your alarm for the next time you think you are going to throw up
And Anthony pissed on himself at the strip club
he took off his pants and apologized in advance if I thought he was too small.
It's gotten to the point where NOT peeing in the sink feels strange and uncomfortable.
I woke up in the penthouse and did lines off the to of the fireplace. This is not real.
want the rest of his teeth to fall out while he slowly dies alone. Pretty sure I'm to the anger phase.
Oh I already celebrated valentine's day. I stayed up until 4 AM listening to biggie, drinking rum, and caressing all my girl curves in front of the mirror. And then I came 3 times.
One huge ass giant mistake followed by celebatory shots and coors lights thats my day in a nut shell
This gem of a conversation has been brought to you be weed
Seriously, even though I keep it clean, I could douse it in bleach and set it on fire and still not be comfortable with you actually holding it. It's been in my VAGINA.
I've learned life lessons in Vegas. Mostly, drugs are cheaper than alcohol.
Woke up at noon, still drunk, naked, with another girl next to me. When she wakes up, I'm gonna have my SECOND lesbian experience with her. How's your 2015 going?
Ya apperently its not "appropriate" to fuck in the school auditorium
You asked him if he would have sex with you under the dinosaur. He declined and then you started crying, blaming the sand.
I didn’t say it was classy, I said it was sexy
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