Dude, she's just using you for your money, and Cavs tickets.
Honestly, what else do I have going for me?
You make a valid point.
We talked him into tasing himself.
At the end of the white elephant exchange, our professor had a big black dildo around her neck and I won a full body dinosaur suit. I could die tomorrow with no regrets.
i like feelif swiord YOU ARE A GOD
Life just isn't the same without him waking me up at 4 in the afternoon with a look of pity on his face...
Hope I didn't wake u up but I woke up and there is a shirt, boxers, belt and jeans on my balcony, along with a naked guy who claimed to scale the building
Bro, you're like, my right testicle. Can't go anywhere without you.
Took off my bra at the laundry mat to throw it in I am officially white trash
I have work in an hour and I'm having trouble with concepts such as 'staying upright' and 'staying conscious'. Tie me to your wrist next time we go out drinking,
Dude your life.. At your sugar daddies house sending nudes to your fwb
It was extremely weird and uncomfortable mid blow job she looks up and says " tell me Simon Cowell makes your dick hard"
literally who communicates this much post-hookup why r u like this
It does not feel like it was just this morning that I had a penis in multiple cavities of my body
I would offer you moral support, but I have questionable morals..
We could have fun in a cardboard box. Think of the damage we could do at an amusement park!
Randomize