Didn't tell him I was on my period. Then had to surreptitiously remove some uterine lining from his cock.
oh my god i am going to vomit. and little burgers wearing crowns are going to come out.
For the millionth time in his career, Brett Favre has screwed over the Vikings
you just used a box of cheese-its to get into the bar
I have a spoon shaped bruise on my ass...
I definitely recall eating shredded cheese out of the bag while you were wearing that apron.
I'm so confused. I feel like I just intentionally took roofies to see where I'd end up.
Remember the 3 things that are off limits? They're fair game if you get here in the next 5 minutes
But the drunk streaking fizzled when one of jake's friends took a piss while running with a massive erection.
I'm really proud of my unchallenged ability to convert boob guys into ass men
HOW CAN YOU EXPECT ME TO KEEP YOUR SECRETS IF YOU KEEP ON TELLING ME THEM.
You have the perkiest tits in all of North America. You're fine.
It's wednesday. OF COURSE HE'S DRUNK.
How does the curb feel today?
It's stronger than my elbow. But I found my lighter while I was down there.
In this house, we have but one simple rule: DONT FUCKIN TOUCH MY STUFF OR I'LL CUT YOUR NECK IN UR SLEEP
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