I thought I was riding a bike, but I guess it was a vacuum cleaner
I'll report later on the progress of the mountain orgy
I think they can follow the trail of blood to my house if they have a problem with me taking a dip in their hot tub last night b4 stepping on a broken bottle
I'll just be here. Naked. Eating tots and jello like a muh fuggin G
High gym went like this: I went to Dairy Queen instead.
No need to talk. Eventually, he'll either stop coming over, or decide that it's a relationship.
And if not?
...I keep getting free bourbon and great sex with no expectations. You really don't understand that there is no "down side," do you?
she's sitting there like the lesbian godfather. A cigarette in one hand and a titty in the other.
Like 50% of me thinks it'll be weird, 25% of me is curious & 25% of me is horny
Seriously, why do I have a mortar round?
I would say don't do anything I wouldn't do, but we both know I forget about my personal safely when getting laid is on the line
well, you know. whores of a feather.
High me is so sweet. She left not-high me a fortune from a fortune cookie and 6 packets of soy sauce in my tampon drawer.
you told me you wanted to be a soccer mom with a high tolerance then you put the bottle to your face
Somewhere on my work laptop I have a map visualizing all the area codes that Ludacris has ho's
I hope that wasn't done on billed time
I can guarantee that it was
Well, I have no idea where my underwear is, so yea I would say it was a good weekend.
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