I smell stomach acid.
My T9 Word has dryhumped saved but I can't even get it to figure out bbq.
they're making a venn diagram comparing gummi bears against gummi worms...is this what i have to sit thru to get free weed????
My piss changed color midstream. Think that means I have a 50/50 chance of passing the test?
I don't know what possessed you to do that, but you have to give the stripper more money before you try to check her oil or they are going to throw us out every time you do that.
this speak and spell drinking game will be the death of us all.
I woke up tied to my bed while she was in the corner staring at me while eating cereal. Interesting night!
I just realized that in 3 weeks it becomes sad if I make everything into a drinking game. Fuck growing up
So when I walked out, everyone was chanting ONE OF US, someone draped a lei over my head, and then she grabbed my ass and dragged me back into the bedroom. I'd say it was a pretty good night to lose my virginity.
If waking up at 6 50 pm every day and getting invited to go have sex as you wake up is what alcoholism is like I can get use to this.
I've had sex near too many of the blankets to let our parents touch them like this
Oh. So it is a cult
Basically. But a nice cult. They eat muffins and talk about fundraising.
may or may not have snorted a line of tums... wtf.
Wtf did i hit my head on?
Tequila
Dude, I'm pretty sure I just drank iced tea last night and yet I'm still hungover. What the fuck is my body anymore ?
Randomize
