And that's when I found out that Patrick wasn't in fact down with O.P.P.
My workout was carrying 2 cases home from the grocery. It's Bowl Week.
I just did my online traffic school at the bar. No biggie.
He gave me a pearl necklace on top of my Karma necklace I was wearing. I guess I deserve whats coming to me.
Just mindlessly walked into the mens bathroom. My vagina has now become its own independent being, looking for penises. I'm just along for the ride.
i should teach a seminar on how to fall off the wagon
i am going to show so many millionaires my nipple
TOUCH YOURSELF. DO IT.
I don't think that's how you're supposed to sext
I can't finger myself when I'm all distracted about whether or not your family is going to like me
I like how zombie Abe Lincoln and hooking up with a girl were on your same thought process.
Today's walk of shame includes last nights hair and make up, an 8 hour shift, me leading a meeting and me throwing up in a parking lot on my way to work. Dear world, you're welcome.
I have work in an hour and I'm having trouble with concepts such as 'staying upright' and 'staying conscious'. Tie me to your wrist next time we go out drinking,
we talked about the guy being eaten by the anaconda.. Then I proceeded to blow him
I hope dressing like a sexy, but very grown up and intelligent, secretary while out shopping helps disguise how high I am right now.
WHAT IS ALL THIS WATER BOTTLE FLIPPING NONSENSE? WHAT IS LIT?
YOUTHS.
Randomize
