Kelly, is this rhetorical, or sarcastic? You are very kind & quite beautiful, but we never really evolved into anything & your prevailing ambivalence spoke more than words ever could.
"We" really do not exist-if we ever did. Both of us may have been hoping for more than was possible.
I would enjoy sitting down to talk about the dissolution, but think it may end up being counter productive.
If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
Time to put an end to this 'unprotected sex with crazy girls who have violent exes' trip I've been on so far this summer
you dont have to exercise, you threw up last night!
...She then said get into the spirit and started making firecracker noises while having sex
This will be the 3rd time you have blacked out and lost your phone only to have some kind stranger find it, charge it, call me, then mail it back to you. Your luck amazes me...
I gotta shower this stuff off me I'm starting to hear baby kittens in the toilet tank again..
On a scale of one to liver failure, how bad would it be if I played thunderstruck alone?
The cop left me alone after I gave her my spare snow cone. It was a hot and humid day and that uniform looked stuffy. Yay stoner me for overindulging in icy treats.
I am going to tweet NASA until they put me into space
Those rocketship riding assholes need the common man
I will forever remember this as The Great Jalepeno Cock Burn of 2014.
I think next time I give head I'm gonna try making the chewbacca noise.
I look forward to it
You ran full speed into the glass door with your Patron and yelled "FEEL THE RHYTHM, FEEL THE RHYME"
My friends said as soon as you walked in, I motor boated you like there was no tomorrow.
Yeah, I liked it.
Idk, but the girl in his story had really nice eyebrows and was singing The Climb. How about you CLIMB the fuck away from my man
FORGET THE EYEBROWS
Randomize
