i've come to the conclusion that there is no classy way to apply chloroseptic spray to your butthole.
it was like she was tryin to eat my face and i was defending myself with my mouth
I feel like this whole "telling that guy i have a kid to avoid him" thing is getting out of hand..
How so?
Probably at the point when i told him i was "Too drunk to drive" and "had to pick up my kid" all in a span of like 2 hours.
I'm heating up a hotdog using a candle.
So for a second i just thought clitoris was a disease.
the trick is not to think about where her tounge has been.
Let me just say....i'm sorry about setting your carpet on fire. I had no idea that the paper towel would burn that quickly.
the ball fondling will be left out of the trip recanting
You are right. The scrape marks on her ass are from her breaking the doggy door by crawling through it.
Dude you're alone at a bar with a woman, and you're talking about my junk?
I'll just be sleeping in this laundry room. Come get me at bar close.
Idk she didn't seem that weird to me but I had just eaten an entire tray of jello infused with liquor so I could be wrong...
I feel badly that he has cancer, but this does not mean I am obligated to have sex with him. Again.
I'm laughing at the fact that I'm at Target right now buying vitamins and alcohol.
I skipped the handshake and went right for a dickshake I had him minutes after I saw him.
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