and when i put it inside her she yelled "welcome aboard!"
The worst thing that has ever happened to me happened today. I was taking donations at goodwill and someone donated a clearly used vibrator
he told me it was because of the roids, but i couldn't tell if he meant ster or hem.
no, i dont want the owner to like me bc i dedazzled my vagina
I wonder who the first pervert was, and if he would be proud of me for advancing his art form by so much
just tried googling 24 hr taco bell and when i typed "24 hour" it autocompleted with fitness. buzzzz killllll
He pretended my clit ring was a door knocker.
ill give you food and tequilla and penis and joy
I bruised my vagina when I was climbing out of the trash can.
My dad just sent me a text reminding me to bring the family beer pong championship belt. Thanksgiving 2012 just got real
I have bite marks all over my ass. Is that an acceptable excuse for missing class?
It's just unfortunate that I still have the image of him having sex with me fresh in my mind
Also a shrinking boner emoji would be helpful
Did I wash my face last night at your house? Where did my eyebrows go??
So I forgot to ask, how was that bartender you slept with two weeks ago?
Google chlamydia.
Randomize
