So we've decided on 'hamburger' as your code for tonight. If you add ketchup or fries, we know the threat level has escalated.
you told all the 17 year old girls at the party that your mating call was "I glitter in the sun"
Can you still call it a wet dream if sandwiches were involved?
If our dicks could shake hands in congratulations they would
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I would like to apologize for making you the target of my "I wish head hair grew as fast as Pubes speech" the other night
We are doing handstands and somersaults in the pool. With an inflatable beer pong table and our regular beer pong table. We're ponging by land and by sea
I'm posted up in the bathroom at au bon pain, high as balls, experimenting with eyeshadow combinations and listening to 90s jlo. The girl in the stall next to me just plopped a big one and I laughed, hope I ruined her day
He broke up with me over the phone while I was getting my bush waxed into a "D" for his surprise birthday present. Talk about bad timing...
he's the second guy to suck on my nipple in front of my friends that i haven't made out with.
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Mainly I just wanna pet bunnies. And purple chicks. Well any color chicks if I close my eyes. But purple if I open them.
I chose not to drink last night but drinking chose me
I mean my dick does have feeling again, which is a step in the right direction
Whatever. I'll take my new fine ass dick sucking nails elsewhere.
Well now you know my birthday fantasy: gangbang consisting of men wearing NPR pledge t-shirts.
What the hell was that?
Genius. It was sheer genius.
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