Just donated money to a kid for her softball team.
Obviously I'm trying to futher our next generation of lesbians. I may be hitting on her at the gay bar in ten years...
Singing into hair straightener during spice girls....sooo dangerous
Why is your signature on my underwear?
yea im pretty sure it has something do with my love of forearms...
I don't have any swimsuits that don't show off the weird handprint bruises on my hips. Do you have a onepiece I can borrow?
There's a point around the one and a half minute mark where the keg stand goes from impressive to pathetic
I kind of feel like BP. I'm dressed in green and absolutely horrible for the environment.
I used my tears to chase my tequila. You could say I rallied.
If there was a card that said "I'm sorry for throwing up on your bathroom counter" I would send it to you.
you're the third guy in less than 24 hours she fucked. I'm glad you lost your virginity just don't act like you climbed Mt. Everest.
My mom said she saw you at the grocery store. Said you looked like you were "headed for a Lindsay Lohan quarter life crisis of sorts"
His dick is curly. It's adorable.
How can i make it up 2 u?
DREW I AM SMOKING POT AND FUCKING. WE CANNOT DISCUSS THIS AT THIS PARTICULAR JUNCTURE.
It’s only loud for those who wanna get loud. The bowlers are protected.
What is the best medium with which to say, "Happy Birthday, I'm having your abortion"... Cake? Card?
Randomize
