Hope the move went well! I'll miss you!
you are a cunt and I hated living with you and your skeezy boyfriend.Just thought I'd get that out there.
When I came home you were using a glowstick to eat peanut butter from the jar.
explaining to a nurse how i all most cut my finger off playing beer pong, she def just hand me a AA booklet.
The office pool is up to $500 if you take a shit in Frank's desk drawer. Time to change the unpaid internship into a cash cow.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dude i should have never cleaned my ears out while high. theres no going back.
just woke up under a car ? That's odd
Holy fucking shit
WAIT BUT IM WEARING A BACKPACK THAT MAGICALLY HAS 30 BEERS IN IT
You were so drunk, you called my cruise control, the "auto pilot" and asked my car politely to take us to Taco Bell.
I AM COVERED IN FAKE BLOOD AND REAL CUM. I AM AWESOME
When you finally get laid, I shall make you a trophy out of dildos
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We exchanged snapchat usernames instead of numbers. Is that what America has come to?
I drank a girls breast milk at this wedding. Shit was next level
idk about you, but when i sext i just hit em with the "yo lets bang" text
While we were having sex he asked me if I wanted to get wingstop after. I think I found my future husband.
"He didn't answer my snap so I know he's arrested"
He started praying immediately after we hooked up, condom on and everything.
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