This is not my ceiling
i voted for prop eight dipshit. more weddings = more CAKE.
so last night my mother drunkenly told me that maybe the reason why I want to be a vet was because I was conceived doggy style.
There will be two dogs there to provide supervision. Not to worry.
5am is far to early to be on jagerbomb number 6 right now
Also, I don't remember opening my gifts from my family. It was cool when I woke up with a new ihome.
he was extremely fucked up- he thought my sports bra was his boxers. even when his leg wouldnt fit. at least whiskey dick wasnt a problem
i woke up and found a picture of his grandma in my purse.. im a kelpto
I just watched Matt try to put on a pillowcase thinking it was a t-shirt.
Well. I guess talking about me stealing your wife may not be in the list of legit conversations
I just need some dick and some jimmy johns
I'll give you some choices for what to get me for Christmas. 1.You naked. 2.You naked 3.You naked.
I came in like 30 seconds, and my dog got to watch me take the walk of shame to the bathroom to clean up. All in all, not my best performance.
Yea I went out in footie pajamas and still got laid. Good night for u?
He pulled out the guitar, sat in tub, and took requests while she puked her brains out in the toilet. I think he loves her.
Randomize
