remember facepaint boy? turns out it stains. aaaand i have it all over my face and neck.
he only lasted three minutes, so to spite him i stayed the night and slept in.
According to the transitive property, he has now had dick in his mouth.
I want a picture of impoverished children wearing Oregon national champions shirts.
Yes, I feel sorry for the tribe that gets those. They won't be able to hide from the lions.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Please don't be alarmed by the blood on my arms and phone in the morning. It's not mine.
There are too many people and smells in this elevator for my hangover to handle.
I've got mace and a condom. Ready to roll either way and keeping my pimp hand strong.
He never answered about passing his structures test no matter how I asked him. He did send a text saying that he would be "pouring alcohol into his head and balls" so I'm guessing he has to retake the whole class.
Some guy just ordered at Cosmo and 2 screwdrivers in the sky club at 8:30 am. I'm starting to feel a lot better about my alcoholism
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The Wolf of Wall Street “I ain’t fuckin’ leaving!” speech when the cops broke up your party though...
Can we relax the "married man" rule just once?
Woke up, bank account is empty. Sock is still full of blood. Nothing in my pockets but a wireless mic and jenga pieces.
He took a shot of vodka and AND ATE ME OUT AS A CHASER. YESSS. I AM IN LOVE.
Vagina status: the swelling is going down.
I’d clean the kitchen before making food. Mark “rang in the New Year” with some rando in there last night
Randomize