who do you think you are?
someone who doesn't ask that question
After she came with my hands around her neck, she sat there for a minute and gave me the scuba diving sign for a-ok.
Babe when I told you that you needed to grow up I didn't mean get drunk and sponsor 8 African kids.
Woke up in the front yard with a chalupa and a firecracker in my back pocket. It's what the founding fathers would want
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I need to find a more grown up way of dealin with a hangover at the office than pringles and mountain dew at 8:30 am...
Hypothetically, if a stripper with braces bites you on the cleavage and it leaves an open wound, do you need a tetanus shot?
The number of males in the usa getting circumsized are decreasing. Keep this in mind when we become cougars
And dildos are 35% off. So. Ya know. Savings.
Whatever. That's why I am to be babied like a calf. I regret nothing.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He literally wrote out a schedule. On it, there's a taco break, and a spot where I start crying.
unless you have a dick and you were thinking of chopping that off
This is me trying to take a picture to send to grandma. At 4. We were trying to look sober.
cmon you know I'm perfectly capable of something that ridiculous 100% sober
Dad hid the hash somewhere in my room and wont tell me where it is until i clean it. My room is spotless. The hash was on the ceiling fan...
Is 6 weeks really a benchmark now?
Ask me in 6 more weeks, when they're in a bisexual polycule.
Randomize