Sorry I thought I was a lizard earlier.
i wish there was an iPhone app that lets you write a TeXt LiKe tHiS
dude...come out of the closet already
you started crying because you didn't get to wear your rainboots this week so i turned on the shower and let you jump around in it
youre the best friend ever
don't ever try to run hungover. just puked mid-run in front of an old couple that were going for a walk. they were horrified.
Is there really anything more beautiful than opening a fresh box of wine on a Friday afternoon?
Wait, whatever happened to locking our vaginas in closets?
he said he needs a little more pabst, some time to jack off and a sandwich and he'll be ready
He is nice. Kind of short though. But didn't try to rub his jean cock on me.
Which I appreciated.
I made out with about ten people last night. And four of them were just on the way to my car from the bar. And one was my roommate.
We hooked up last night. I think it was great for our friendship.
Idk my boobs are big but i dont think theyre hide a flask in them big..
I still have that dildo-suction bruise on my forehead and this sweater STILL smells like my Christmas Eve vomit.
I'm sure he likes you too... but your boyfriend is kind of a cockblock
I figure I since I made out with him that I at least had to save his number in my phone.
He fucked me so hard my contacts fell out! Didnt know that was possible.
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