Not only do prius' look terrible they are terrible to have sex in
once the "do it" chant starts, any shot at an even remotely dignified party experience is dead.
then she said she was half-a-virgin and that she would appreciate it if i would finish what her old booty call started
We need to tone down the drinking before our 7pm class. I don't remember receiving any of these handouts.
It's like a toaster oven for my penis
You took my underwater blowjob virginity.
Jus saw ur date getting a bj in the mcdonalds parking lot...u want anything?
i'm pretty sure i can feel a baby kicking just looking at him. if he didnt impregnate you, you officially have an iron-clad uterus.
Oh, cold wet seat on the 48! Are you piss? Are you the sweaty ass leavings of an obese person? Are you the spilled King Cobra from the night before? I do not know! I dare not smell to find out... Pants ruined...
it's pizza time hurry your sexcapades
Go have sex with him right now! Drunk sex is the best sex.
I know but these gold fish are so much better
Just realized tomorrow is the anniversary of the time Dean and I glued DJ's leg back together with Neosporin and an Ace bandage. I'm bringing red velvet cupcakes to the party to celebrate.
I woke up in a limo in long Island, Ny this morning. Talk about a black out
I know you can't find me. Somehow I ended up on the roof smoking a cig with the strippers that are on break. Way too drunk to deal with this right now.
There were a lot of gay moments in between the Strippers and coke
Randomize
