When the moon hits your eye like a big pizza pie, you're a dumbass
Transgendered man at work dawning a slutty batman costume. I hate Halloween
that awkward moment when your booty call gets snowed in at your place.
All I know is he mentioned whips, leather cuffs, and a riding crop. It's like Halloween, Christmas, and My birthday all in one. a 5 year old couldn't even possibly be this excited.
You asked him for a membership to him and his dick.
Any formal decision about whether we're planning to objectify naked women with daddy issues tonight?
After the party last night, I dreamt I continued drinking... Apparently my subconscious didn't think I'd had enough...
Don't pretend you don't want to dance on the edge of overdose all three nights
Just set myself on fire a little bit. Made me think of you.
You fell asleep mid blowjob with my vibrator in your HAND. So no, I will not bring you pizza.
Just realized Ive never seen my f buddy in the daylight. What if he looks different?
I just put vodka in my apple sauce. Spice up your fucking life.
Just saw Little Red Riding Hood riding a guy on hood of a car
Good for her for committing to the costume
I couldn't find my contact solution so I thought mixing toothpaste and water would work
Any luck with the purse?
No, though I did find her weed. Also her sons name is King. I'm uncertain how I feel about that
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