I'll write directions out on a napkin and slip it to him. Then say P.S. The UTI is gone.... that's not creepy at all right?
it was like fucking gandolphs beard
there's nothing like that first "just failed out of my program" beer
I told her the maid must have stolen all my condoms. She bought it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Is it cum slut, cumslut or cum-slut? Sexting, plz advise ASAP
He had to carry me to the car. But then sat with me and waited for me to sober up enough to have sex. He's a keeper.
Beer pong consisted of me throwing a ball at the wall and then falling over because moving my arm made me dizzy. I think our team lost.
There was an Altoids can full of urine in the bathroom. I do not want to know what was going on in there.
They invited me day drinking but brought their kids. 3 two year olds and 1 11 month old. I was asked to change a diaper, I laughed and took another drink of this margarita. I LIKE CHANEL AND TEQUILA NOT CHILDREN. Can we make new friends?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I found myself looking up beard accounts while masturbating, I guess that's what it's come to.
I'm not winning any crowns in the Miss Emotionally Stable pageant either...
You ghosted you're own booty call. Wow what a sad sad man.
shit i just threw up on a freshman
i don't know if i should laugh or feel bad..
nevermind it was a sophmore, laugh.
I mean that was the nicest way to be dumped by some one I wasn't dating.
Its like he got lessons from Jesus on how to use his tongue. And his dick.
Randomize