this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
My mom just said we needed to put weed into our earthquake kit.
FYI, when you wake up, please note that I puked in your shoes because I sstubbed my tooee, not becus I was drunk.
Not complaining, but why is there a Russian chick downstairs making latkes?
So, sleeping with all of my Vicodin in my bra because I knew she'd be searching my room for drugs tonight. I'LL SHOW HER.
Haha! I've never met his girlfriend, so my main focus will be not saying,"you're the only person in this room that doesn't know what my vagina feels like."
The only pictures I have are of me being stoned or me looking like a man, which do you prefer?
It was great. They teamed up to hit on these two frat boys all night, until the frat boys started making out with each other. The looks on their faces...
I walked in her room to find her rubbing lotion on her face high as fuck.
my last search of the night was "the physics of green eggs and ham" what the fuck
Blow jobs in the hobby lobby parking lot, oh lawd there gonna pray for me when they review those tapes ...
Come on kid, foreplay is elementary stuff. It's a vagina, not a sphinx.
the only reason I'm still sleeping with him is to get the university's secure wifi password
I woke up with a twisted ankle and was covered in lube. Not entirely sure what happened last night
So you can now add nose to my list of places that cum has gone that it shouldn't...
Randomize
