Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
we are all sexual creatures
yea maybe. but you're not. you're not getting any.
When god put her together, he was drunk & feeling creative... a vagina here, sexually ambiguous breasts there, and a pair of shoulders that would make a linebacker jealous
He was so bad, he was dry humping me and his dick was nowhere close to my vagina.
Well, I want to see you regardless of whether or not you will lick whipped cream off my body.
I made him an O's fan. One pic of my tits coming out of a Baltimore shirt and it was done.
Could you imagine living in a city where bartenders are available by 1:30 AM
I'd have like 4 kids by now and at least one std
Had the best sex Thursday night then Friday night I met his girlfriend. The worst thing is we became friends like she gave me her number.
Should I put the money for my dealer in a Christmas card? You know, make it more frstive?
GUESS WHOSE BEST FRIEND IS OUT OF PRISON!
then you dropped a clam in a draught beer like it was a drop shot and and started chugging as beer spewed all over your body.
He had a clap on lamp. So every time he was ramming into me, the lights kept turning on and off
I'm waiting for your stupid pizza and this 400 lb drunk man is behind me singing the acapella version of Elevation by U2
Lmao. K I'll be 100% honest. I was over at your place like 12 hours ago with your roommate. If I hadn't of been there then I'd take you up on your booty call offer. So. If you're not creeped out another time please?
Grandma had me open the boxes that were delivered today. She got a sex swing, I've settled on "You go girl" as my official reaction.
Randomize
