hey, what are you doing? my roommates are gone for the night... you should come over ;)
nah, i'm gonna grab some food
I just googled "whats above a trillion", thats how busy I am at work.
so he came on my face and then proceeded to say "that was just how i imagined it would happen"
where do you find these guys?
A female Wisconsin fan just headbutted the bouncer. Im deeply terrified and oddly aroused at the same time.
There is NOTHING better than watching a child being chased by an ostrich.
Just saw the first guy I gave head to lose in the french open...some how I feel better that my mistake made it to the same mistake as our relationship, the third round. Don't judge.
Does anyone know why "math wizard" is written on my arm?
I don't remember much of last night. But I woke up with very apologetic texts from him this morning so apparently I didn't get laid. Which is stupid.
your vagina must have magic restorative powers I feel rested and powerful this morning.
YOU'RE CHANGING THE SUBJECT. I CAN BLOW SOMETHING UP OR I CAN TELL HIM YOU LOVE HIM, BUT ONE OF THE TWO IS BOUND TO HAPPEN
Showing up to Easter hungover, late, and covered in black an blues from pole dancing. Daughter of the year.
Then that is decided. Fuck away my little bunny rabbit.
Day one of being single and I've came three times. I can get used to this.
how am i in montreal? thats like a 3 hour train ride. i remember nothing.
I'm totally picking out my shrooming outfit and blankets right now
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