im sorry i didnt take advantage of you..iwaned to
i wanted you to too
I realize that when i start making 24-themed music videos in my head to the song 'love is a battlefield' that i really need to get out more
He's paying me $45 to clean his room and $55 if i find the oxy that he lost.
he doesnt exactly give off the "im mature enough to use my penis" vibe
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I feel like he knows I had a dream about him eating me out in the janitors closet at the holiday party. He's giving me THAT look.
After he came all he could say was how great the lighting fixtures where in my apartment.
Some guy is here using a taser on people. I'm up next
he came to me for relationship advice and we ended up fucking in my backseat
the bartender knew what was up when i took a sip of my drink, gagged and asked her to water down my water
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also this just in, I think you could see my sequins underwear that say unwrap me through my leggings all day while I hung out with his family
Considering all of my stomach contents ended up in my center console, I'm a bit peckish.
I made a separate snapchat account so I could swap nudes with a guy from omegle.
Why do all of your bad decisions sound like fucked up mad libs?
Drunk purchased a negligee, plan b, keds and Himalayan salt shot glasses.. there’s only one reasonable purchase there, and we both know it’s not the sneakers
I have hit the ultimate fuck buddy status. We pulled over in a construction zone to have a quickie.
You know when you're a kid and you play at the pool until you passed out? It was like that except instead of playing it was sex.
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