I told him it tasted like his mom..needless to say we were asked to leave.
Gym doesn't open till 11. I'm sure that of the other four people waiting in the lobby, I'm the only one still drunk and only going to the gym to shower.
It's all fun and games until the last slice of pizza gets bong water spilled on it.
I love taking my adderall while im in class! As soon as I take the pill out everyone around me just stares in envy!
Am I really that girl who walks around half naked wearing a cowboy hat begging for liquor at some random guys house
stef broke her leg trying to vault over the coffee table. these olympics drinking games are going to fucking kill us
I think I've just evolved into some kind of vodka fueled monster
You asked the waitress what the corking fee would be on the Joose you smuggled into the restaurant.
We hooked up and then we watched game of thrones while he fed me chocolate. I don't see how our benafriendship is a bad thing.
Nothing quite like walking through a spider web on your way back in from smoking to fuck up a perfectly good high.
Last night must have been awesome because I went to get in the shower only to find the bat symbol drawn on my chest
That happened during battle shots lol
I remember caressing his hands asking him if he moisturized, then i proceeded to put his hands on my face
I do not mind being torn from the first touches of sleep to see a man who looks like that
Hey it's Males-You-Probably-Wish-You-Hadnt-Had-Sex-With Monday. MYPWYHHSWM
Being single again makes you realize how guys can go from licking your asshole one night to never texting you again
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