she pooed on me. she actually pooed on me.
if someoen knew that someone accidentally drunkly kissed your boyfriend would you want them to tell you/?
followup question: what if both somones were me?
As of tonight I have officially had sex during every Disney movie.
im pretty sure thats the first step to being a pedafile
the $20 limit for secret santa doesn't apply to me cause you know a half gram of coke is more than $20
He bought me dinner. He gave me his jacket when I was cold. And then ate me out in the passenger sear of the car.
You're a college freshman. Its your job to be pathetic. And drunk. But mostly pathetic
I don't know if this whole sobriety thing is going to work out... It's only been 3 days and I want to chug vodka
My new year's resolution was to squirt this year. I only have four months left. Help.
If I get to the point of singing Man of Constant Sorrow then please god let me do it, record it, then cut me off.
if i ever wake up in the morning and don't feel a boner in my asscrack then this relationship is over
You cannot meet up with him at the tailgate, his parents are there. What are you going to say "Hi I'm the one who fucks your son, can I get a cheeseburger?"
I met his parents. We played twister. My boob popped out.
I was giving him head and he slipped one of those hats with propellors on top on my head.
Funniest thing happened to Chloe! She talked the bf into a mmf threesome, and he loudly and enthusiastically discovered he was gay during it. Whole dorm literally heard it happen.Well funny for me. Chloe not so much.
Heels with jeans turned Casual Friday into Casual Sex With My Boss Friday
Randomize
