It's a miracle Ok Typing texts toYou right now
I looooooove Saturdays!!!!!!!
I am absolutely hammered
I am not drunk. I will recite the pledge.
I don't want you to recite the pledge!
Pledge alligien to america to united states of america
Also, i'm pretty sure i've had my birth control pill stuck in my throat since like...two pm. So i'll be practicing safe oral sex tonight.
im using the astroglide sample u sent me as a bookmark for the book im using to write my midterm paper. i need to get laid. bad.
SEE! I KNEW I HAD A LONG-TERM REASON FOR BEING A SLUT!
I woke up with my keys safelty pinned to my thong. It's gonna be a great day.
Barack Obama mentioned plan B and suddenly this address seems a lot more personal
I wish I was a power ranger. Also the universe is immense. Like it never ends. Never.
I can now recognize that when my wine bottle reaches a certain point, I probably shouldn't tweet, text or call anyone. RESPONSIBILITY
But I made it seem like I wasn't hungover at work, so that's a plus.
I moved to this city Tuesday and got laid Saturday. Still got it.
I guess the weekly d&d orgies are treating you well
It was a glorious ass. He has amazing hands. I want to fuck him until he can't do math anymore.
My thoughts mid terrible hookup: do people normally read a magazine right about now?
Guess who cheated on their SATs? Also on the same line guess who's getting in to Princeton at damn near free of charge?
Randomize
