Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
It only happened twice. Once we used extra virgin olive oil and once I used saliva and brute force.
All the good ones are taken. All that's left is the Harry Potter geek or the asshole in the corner. I think I'll settle for Harry Potter.
I thought that since they were twins... they would be equally as good in bed
she just gave her compliments to the chief, at dennys
Ok just don't go to jail. I saw your account balance. It can't take that.
I think i smell like relationship. That's my problem.
I got pulled into the conversation by "she sleeps with everybody" then "she" involved sleeping with "cocks the size of a viva burrito"
Although I am concerned about who made the decision to let you loose in a bridal show I am proud to see you in a sombero again.
Hey remember that spam cooked in dr pepper we made? 10x better when the dr pepper is rum
I'm still in my ugly sweater and underwear drinking coffee next to a plate of assorted treats we stole from the party. I got a new sweater by the way, its shoulderpad-y and looks like a news anchor got thrown up on by Liberace. I'm pretty proud.
And then I cried about the Cubs for a half hour. If my dignity hadn't already been lost by that point in the night, it sure as hell was then.
Or I could hide in your trunk so you can sneak out of putt putt for sex breaks
He called my vagina "the man cave", and I found it charming
DUDE FUCK CALL ME SHE HAS GRANDKIDS
Randomize
