I call biggest shit show at the party. I welcome all challengers.
What a tease, dude. She's giving me emotional blue balls.
New discovery: conditioner is better for jerking off than baby oil. Fuck yes.
I didn't sleep with her. I'm boycotting arizona and she's from phoenix.
she told me to hold the wheel while she hung out the sunroof and cursed the old lady behind us out.
FOUR LOKO IS YES. SUNDAY MORNING DRUNK IS YES.
I just wanted to hook up with a white guy to prove that i could go back.
underwater hpnotiq shots? sure why not.
He puked in the voicemail. That's a true friend right there.
We kind of broke a table making out. So yes, I'd say it was successful.
I'm the girl holding the bag of goldfish
Just remember that no one else gets to suck his dick but you, feel honored. It's like the Olympic torch of life is being passed off to you and it's your time to run
Which emoticons convey sympathy for sleeping with someones bf ??
I've never been so drunk at home. I just sat on the toilet playing with toilet paper for ten minutes, I almost made a paper crane.
You’ll lick BBQ off my cock but no ketchup on a hotdog?
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