# days @ Coachella: 1 people i showed how to break it down: 279
tell ils to like buy her flowers and like a balloon that says, sorry I tried to fuck your sister. I think hallmark makes some of those cards too.
It was weird to see you drinking wine out a glass instead of a red cup today
My grandma had to be escorted out by police.
i thought i'd fucked her to death. no lie. she just stopped moving.
If you're receiving this text it's probably because I drunkenly flashed you on Saturday. Sorry for forcing you to look at my tits. That was uncalled for.
Im currently watching two girls making out. In the library. Hope your studying is going as good as mine is. Haha
Yea no bueno and I only brought enough weed to last one night. And it was no Hanukah nug, it didn't last 8 days.
You don't have a wife, you don't have a dog, and you need a new bong. Don't make this any worse than that.
just almost had a panic attack because i couldn't find the granola bar i put in my purse. i miss klonopin.
I literally walked into the toilet, looked at my reflection, said "alcohol" and went back to bed...
Well, he didn't buy me a birthday present but he sure did give me chlamydia so there's that.
The tamale guy is fucking with me, I wanna sleep in he wakes me up; early wake-n-bake and he's late and I'm hungry
That’s talent right there. Maverick and Goose type shit.
Its safe now. But... Nobody should sleep on my bed tonight.
Randomize
