I molested 6 butterflies tonight
Goodnight sugar queer
Sugar queer??
Why does my predictive text prioritize 'queer' over 'puffs'?
Do they fuck in the end of "Lady and the Tramp" or am i just wasting my time
So... I just got back from the chiropractor... And he said I have a slight neck injury from head banging too much. Fuck yes.
I'm sitting in the middle of them on his bed, forcing them to watch Brokeback Mountain. I am the best cock blocker ever.
... there are chew marks on my license. I have no idea.
Ok, let's play "if you were a slut" again and try and retrace our steps last night..
Our brains have an emergency blowjob override switch. You saw proof tonight.
And I can taste the vodka through my ears. Good god.
It's either gonna be a cock in my mouth or a burger. You decide which.
I don't think I can recall what a 23 year old cock felt like if one slapped me in the face.
AND WHAT FELONIES DID I MISS OUT ON WHILE SLUMBERING!?
I can't believe this. 100 bucks says my Botox lasts longer than their marriage will.
He was like 120 lbs and 20 of that was penis
He's not put together enough to have that big of a dick
Randomize
