I thidmdmk you'gre a special person
i was so high i thought his mole came off and was flying around
Dude, she knew her leg was on fire and she kept dancing. Bad-fucking-ass.
he kept whispering yes yes yes yes the entire 15 minutes. i almost wish it was a quickie.
He could tell i had a fever by feeling my tits. He gets docter of the year.
I have reached the point in my life where I realized this is what I'm going to do for the rest of my life. Eat, shit , bar, drink, drank, drunk.
He told me that if I were a guy he'd go gay for me. Honestly don't know how to take that.
I'm glad you have such faith in my ability to find the worst situations with my vagina.
If I come back tomorrow to find a certain football player tied up and locked in your closet, shit's gonna get real.
I'll set him free tomorrow morning ;)
We were all in the pool and he showed up with a pitcher of margarita. Everyone swam over to him. He poured it directly into our mouths like we were a Sea World act.
There is a high possibility I will pass out with my hand in a bag of Doritos
You screamed "i promise ill stop blowing your brother" in the middle of a packed restaurant at 1pm. We should maybe rethink our relationship.
I just quoted part of the Pokemon theme song in a sext... And it worked
Thank you for dog sitting, there is $60 on my desk to be spent on DRUGS AND/OR GAS ONLY not that food stuff people crave.
He deliberately gets me high because he knows I fuck better and then I make food for two. I don't know if I should feel mad or proud of him for thinking that far.
Randomize
