I'll collect that couch/porn sloopy beedge tomorrow just FYI
He's so far in the closet he's in Narnia
stupid gm bankruptcy made me miss the showcase showdown
Those cock suckers. We need to know who's winning the hot tub and the vacation to the alps
do you think my med school application would be worse off if "I like helping others and shit" slipped into an essay I emailed last night?
Now I know how you felt every time you had to listen to me have sex with a girl... mildly disguested yet marginally proud.
I buy you gas. You blow me. Economics.
It's just a matter of time. The ball is in my court. Soon to be in her mouth.
the bar just sent me a facebook message congratulating me on being a regular and getting such good grades. my life is not real.
There's something odd about buying beer for the first time while wearing my school sweater from kindergarten, but I don't mind.
New drinking game. Every time Romney and Santorum switch leads, take a shot.
....this is what your political science major is getting you?
Btw kudos to your tongue last night. Sorry about that lady jizz in your beard.
I vaguely remember hanging my bra off the ceiling fan and chugging a beer during sex
College has turned you into quite the multi tasker huh?
shotgunning beer in rite aid bathroom. hurry
someone at the bars was yelling at the bouncer to let him in because he "just passed through the 7 levels of the candy cane forrest" soulmate?
go meet him and give him your number.
Im drunk taking pregnancy tests with this really hot girl...i dont know what is happening
Randomize