Bristol Palin says: Remember to use protection
I'd be more interested in girls if they were more interested in anal.
Just got a blowjob to the theme of Bohemian Rhapsody as the sun was rising. I should just kill myself because ill never top this moment.
She introduced herself and then asked "have you ever fucked a girl with a cast?"
Her exstacy made her nickname everyone David. Nobody knows who the fuck she's talking to so we just say no to everything she says. She's crying.
Is it possible to get a DUI in a wheelchair that's not yours?
The office pool is up to $500 if you take a shit in Frank's desk drawer. Time to change the unpaid internship into a cash cow.
I can't tell if I'm still on the hangover from last night, or if I'm experiencing the one from tomorrow, because it was so powerful that it actually traveled back through time...
"I'm not drinking any more tonight." As I dipped my quesadilla in a shot of tequila....then eats it
I got to my internship late... with a bag of chipotle and sex hair.
he offered me cocaine within 5 minutes of my arrival. yes of course i'm keeping him
Update: my mom just told someone to shut up and suck her dick
He let me share his family pack of hot pockets with him. Chivalry isn't dead after all.
is it still the walk of shame if his dad gave me a 'thanks for sleeping with my son' head nod on my way out this morning?
Our son just found our secret Sex Dungeon that is no longer hidden in our basement. He brought his Xbox and the TV down there he is currently sitting in the sex swing playing video games. What do I do?
Randomize
