they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
please tell me if i'm home and in my bed
negative
come find me please
hahaha Yeah oh well, she wrote on my facebook wall, That's almost like a digital hand job
Hulk Hogan has now convinced 2 women to marry him & I have yet to have a successful or healthy relationship. I am officially depressed.
I got you a housewarming gift. It starts with "A" and ends with "bottle of Jameson"
I love how my cats smell like pot.
What would you do in exchange for having a girl eat a waffle house waffle off your body?
i woke up this morning and saw her in my bed and i said to myself, I think I might have a drinking problem.
Wait, you seriously DON'T keep vodka in your backpack??!??!?
Why are you there anyways?
Pickin up ball pit balls from craigslist
Directions to your booty call: go down the part of Route 66 that has all the car dealerships, motels and bad decisions, go past the Christian college and turn left at the Children's Center.
smoked four grams out of a bong with a mixture of pool water and white rum. I applaud you for leaving before losing too many brain cells.
Dude it's sisterhood of the traveling wine glasses here
Hun, it's always cinco de Drinko in our family. It's like Groundhog Day. Only with more booze.
Just finished 151. Eating nutella off a spoon. Bring condoms.
I think I kinda scared him when I tried to wrap his snake around his dick while he was trying to nap.
Randomize
