I'm just sayin u wanted to sleep after ur paper. I can make u sleep
He said i was a degenerate twofaced catholic slut and a grade a bitch. Quite complimentary really. i guess i shouldn't insult the red wings
Ahhh... Adderall running out my nose in the shower really brings back memories.
Im going home to examine my vagina with a hand mirror. wish me luck.
i walked in and you were spoon feeding your sister grape juice out of a tupperware.
and then he publicly announced her herpes on facebook.
So fucked up. Can't tell if I'm starving or about to puke. Playing it safe and eating froot loops. Tasty in, colorful out.
I really need to find a new way to reward you other than head scratches, nutella and blowjobs.
So as your former husband, I get to give you away at the wedding right?
I'm sitting on the toilet just to avoid my bosses look of disapproval
Oh, also as a concerning side note, my bra had drops of blood on it. So I don't know what the deal was, but someone I was around was definitely bleeding a decent amount.
I couldn't do it. You can't break up after that many orgasms. It's physically impossible.
If I learned anything from that one time I saw the last 10 minutes of oprah when they talked about the secret, it is that you project what you receive back. I also have wine.
He started yelling "you tha man!" while I was reverse cowgirl
The adults are the big ones right?
Randomize