your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
I think tequila should come with a little jiminy cricket
I love hooters. This dumb bartender is saying how coffee dehydrates you so that's why she sometimes just eats the coffee grinds wake up.
i keep myself tagged when other girls look bad/ugly so i look better
nothing says platonic group sex like a campfire and smores
i kinda regret how quickly i gave it up to him, but i just wanted the regular fucking to begin soon. ah we made good memories.
One girl peed the bed, one lost her panties, another woke up on the piano, I have pink eye and door knobs are missing. This is why I stay in Nebraska
found scuba porn. totally not sexy. life continues to disappoint.
Doctorate. Vaginahole. Cinnamon. Rainbow. Fill in the blanks in the morning.
They made up a new version of "Smash or Pass" called "I would(n't) let you sit on my face" to yell at the freshman
At one point I yelled "THIS IS MY PENANCE FOR EVERYTHING I'VE DONE WRONG" and started saying Hail Marys
If you don't see me at the bar tomorrow night, I was most likely captured by the communists.
You handed me your heels and said, "barefoot running is all the rage." Then you proceeded to run home.
Okay. Did I say I did anything unusual? Because I usually do weird stuff. Did I clean mirrors? My mirrors are really clean, and I think I remember having windex..
...i have a beer in one hand, and a chicken wing in the same. typical tuesday, right?
Randomize
