chris hansen is no longer pursuing child predators.let's celebrate
i'll bring the hard lemonade and lube
So let me get this straight. You would sleep with an uncircumcised guy whose name you didn't know, but you won't try the new shrimp taco from taco bell?
Thank you, bloody toiletpaper I found in the hamper. I was worried that today was going to be boring.
I wish the ER had shaved that part of my head. It would be easier to show people my staples at the bar.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Someone shattered a urinal.
Hey guy that stepped on my foot, don't slap my ass to apologize.
He snapchatted me his dick and he's circumcised....BRB going to hug his Mom
Dang. We need a girls trip ASAP. Preferably in a country who has even lower standards than us on a Friday night.
I asked him if he wanted a pillow, and he replied "No. Batman never had pillows."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's like that thing with the devil and the angel except one shoulder has orgasms and the other has stuffed crust pizza and depression.
She had a glow in the dark pastie on her forehead the last time I saw her. That should help you find her.
I feel like I missed the land of milk and honey and instead wound up in the land of beer and pizza. And yet, I think I'm happier here.
You never know true fear until you're on your period in a house full of white furniture.
Quick, I need a picture of your dick. Don't ask questions, just show me your genitals.
My mom just told me I look like darth vader. how's your night?
Randomize