1. Call me if you need ANYTHING. 2. If you get tag teamed, I want details.
just smoked a bowl with my history teacher. i love community college
I need a booty call who doesn't know my boyfriend or my friends.
hes so high that he's convinced hes a duck. hes squating in the bathtub quacking. that was NOT JUST pot.
My sink just fell out of the wall. I can't deal with this right now
I feel like I have streams of color and coldness wrapping around my body.
If that's all it takes to cure your hangovers then you need to drink more.
I was at a bus stop, eating a load of bread. Fairly sure I'm the poster child for poor students.
that man is just a bundle of powerful magic and poor judgment
I don't want random pictures of your morning wood. It's like, what a glorious morning oh a penis.
I tried to light my cup as a bong. I'm done drinking
Didn't pick classes because we were out all weekend...only open course is "alcohol and drug problems". Fucking ironic.
I just know what's gonna happen. I mean. I shaved my legs up to shorts length. But I'm leaving the rest as a sort of makeshift caution tape.
I wish I could be the kind of drunk Bobbi is... She stumbles around outside at 4am with a broken high heel and babbling about rainbows and getting dick...
Have you ever wanted to murder the Sun? To bring the life-giving fusion reactor to a bitter end because of the sheer agony it brings to your eyes as it keeps you awake. And for waking the birds. Fuck birds.
Randomize
