I've decided that I only have enough money to either eat or drink over the next month. I'm sure you know what choice I've made.
did you ever find your cell phone? and your dignity?
I think i found my new favorite workout. Go to a party where you dont know anybody and constantly walk around the house so you dont look awkward standing alone. im up to 1.8 miles
Well, what part of "I've heard she has crabs" didn't you take into consideration?
Why is there not a 'day after acid' genre. Or even a pandora station or something.
I'm trying on my bridesmaid dress so that I can determine what will need to be done to achieve getting fucked while wearing it.
he's dressed up as pikachu 3 fucking years in a row and gotten laid each time. i don't understand
No more fucking baseball tools. Walk-of-shamed home in only a pinstriped jersey and a Red Sox SnapBack.
Someone downtown drunkenly stole the antenna off of her car... while she was driving.
no, you don't understand how much people deal here. All I had to say was "hey lets buy a bag" and he pulled over instantly, then the randoms in the car behind us pulled over and sold us a bag.
Like I'm getting finger banged and my family is making cookies in the kitchen. Talk about terrifying
i just realized... if i ever hook up with someone on my bed, we'll be fucking atop my animated batman themed bedset.
I think pants incapable of making pants work
I DONT WANT YOUR DICK. I WANT BRUNCH.
I was actually kind of excited. I mean, how many people can say they've been question by the CIA?
Randomize
