In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
Why does it always sting when I'm breaking the seal taking a piss?
b/c u have herpes
No i said "always", not "since 2003" Asshole.
What started out as a threesome has become me sitting here watching them have sex... Can I get a ride home?
Just got blown on the bus in front of abot 20 ppl. Lots of high fives.
I will never try to masturbate with americas funniest home videos playing in the background ever again
hanging out with you guys is like living the wikipedia entry for drugs...not sure i can handle that tonight.
She said I'm so hungry I could eat a dick and winked at me
If that's all it takes to cure your hangovers then you need to drink more.
Dude, it's not gay. It's winter.
In my dream, you became a famous tap-dancer. Congratulations.
Was I at least a good cuddler? Like at least honorable mention?
Dude, you GARGLED with bleu cheese last night!
I'm just saying, if you haven't been dropped off at a Wawa at 5:30 in the morning by 3 cop cars, you're missing out
You know it's bad when I'm eating a cold chicken breast alone in bed 😕
For the love of god, if any of you are up, bring me pants.
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