Why would you say my penis is small in front of so many people?
Of course I was flustered, I had a lot of penis in my face.
If she were to ever cheat on her husband, I'm positive I'm the the go to guy. Which flatters me and weirds me out at the same time.
Saturday at 4 is jello wrestling sponsored by the senior class council. That's why my school is awesome. Boom.
So I am guessing last night was a success we are all accounted for and only 3 of us have hospital bracelets on
My radar detector detects ice cream trucks. I think it was made for stoners
I have way too big of a thanksgiving food baby to enjoy any of my old high school booty calls
She insisted on cleaning her room in the dark. 5 minutes in, she forgot what she was doing and started putting shirts on instead of hanging them up.
Your argument isn't valid... just because I test the waters doesn't make me gay. Makes me versatile. And who doesn't love that!
Don't be too mad at the guy who broke your kitchen table. Didn't get his name, but he knew all about your gay porn career. Like DETAILS...
Curdled. you forgot that word. It was a curdled buttery nipple shot.
I now have a bottom rung on my kissing scale. Like I can say "Well. On a scale of Matt to Braxton he was probably a Zach." It's the little things.
I'm not THAT invested in seeing you to an orgasm
Like I said, all hypothetical...unless, of course, you'd be into that. My heart may skip a beat.
Bring beers. The password is "I brought beers" but you can't come in if you're a liar
Randomize
