farters have to be the big spoon...
I got a 69.7 in accounting. I have this whole doing the bare minimum down to a science
Everyone is in jail. I'll see what i can do though
We smoked speed and opium for the first time. ended up harvesting cucumbers with locals at 9am in a farmers field. Laos is fuckin crazy.
Fuck underwear. Let's get stoned and eat ravioli.
Instead of getting a taxi some gay black guy drove us home. He is trying to break into the taxi business
Way to promote small business.
Come over. We're getting stoned and watching DogTV
I have no idea how but i got a hold of a blue food dye packet. And proceeded to rub it all over my tits. So yeah i'd say its safe to say i'll be known as smurfette for a while
I'm a terrible person when I drink. I went from fine to not making any sense and yelling about cheese in like 30 seconds.
One of the finest moments in my life was when I was puking in between my legs as I was shitting, and thought to myself "hmm this shall be called shomiting."
I'm at that stage of drunk where just imagining having sex makes me motion sick.
Wow I really just sharted up in this Kroger
I think I won an award for shitting and vomiting at the same time.
Is it bad that whip cream tastes like sex to me?
I woke up spooning with two strangers on Saturday morning... I felt like a sexual sandwich
Randomize
