its like his balls were made of silver and he was trying to polish the tarnish off
yeah worst sex in my life. plus i think her little brother was in the room.
After I talked about my ex for about twenty minutes, she just listened, sluts are so understanding
you should wait a day or two to break up with your girlfriend
why?
so we can have sex in the meantime. It adds a little excitement.
My roommate still talks on AIM. What is this middle school?
so it turns out that "condoms galore" does, indeed, come up on your bank statement
sorry for the blank pocket text. My penis obviously has nothing to say to you.
this is worse than the time i threw up a condom.
When he grabbed my tits it felt like he was either giving me a mammogram or trying to pierce my nipples with his fingers.
You kept trying to use my cat as a napkin.
Only he would come to a strip club and talk about an internship with Walt Disney during a lap dance.
You might be at the point of severe desperation when you gotta hold the two pieces of your broken vibrator together just to get off.
the bandages come off on Tuesday. we can try out my new breasts then.
Literally this kid just told me he's not planning to live past 30. Then he hit himself with a frying pan.
We literally laid down in the back of my car and had sex in a parking lot and it was in the top 3 best moral-less decisions I've made.
Randomize
