i can now get sex on a playground off my list of things to do in life.
One of her kids, Dakota I think, got stuck in a ceiling fan and she had a fit, thats when she found the penis hat.
I love how all these freshman girls think that they can wear what they wore last summer... freshman 15 at its skankiest
Is it a bad thing I remember to take my birth control when I stumble across guys I've had sex with on facebook?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
NExt question... Do i wanna sleep under my palm tree
YES.
I just had to ask my dad for money to pay for my birth control. I've hit financial rock bottom.
i'm sitting in the second floor bathroom drinking coronas in the shower. do not find me.
His dick is longer than my foot and I'm a size 9. I'm literally kicking myself in the vagina
I'm mumbling to people and trying not to accidentally shit my pants
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up at 4am on the floor covered in olive oil and fire extinguisher powder but all I wanted to know was where the rest of my booze was at.
I forced myself to puke in my garbage can, and the next day I bought a new one and burnt the old one. You could say it was a rough night
You were drinking whiskey from a beer bottle i dont know what you really expected...
I get so many dick pics from him...He has an unhealthy obsession with his own penis...
This week I fucked a police officer and called both the Senators from the state I'm in and the one I'm moving to. What have you done since the election?
When I met you, I was just like "who the fuck is this drunk chick throwing up on my bed?" But I'm glad we're friends now
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