I want to be a jewelry store heckler. "Hey man, is she really worth it"
If i see another girl turn you down you should either turn gay or just kill yourself
On my arm I have 12 dashes, and below is written "plus 2 pretty stout whiskey drinks, so, you be the judge"
she peed. on the sidewalk. it is 2 pm. Help.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
whoever set the energy saving light timer in the lobby bathroom cleraly has no concept how long a work dump takes
it's like his penis is God's way of saying "sorry about his face"
All I remember is doing a naked tuck and roll of your bed.
Fuck. I'm going to pass the savings right on to the strippers. It's trickle down economics.
He can spot Burberry from half a bar away. He's not into vag
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i dont know how he's 22 and thinks emoticons will get him laid. lady boner just died.
It is completely possible to eat beef jerky sexually.
I dapped up a cop while leaving the party
You were silly, high, and chewing on things.
Hey, what's a nice way of saying "Why'd you send me a picture of your boobs last night" without seeming ungrateful?
Finally hooked up with Ryan. Now I know why they call him “Beast Mode”. So. Many. Orgasms.
Randomize