we sang "a whole new world" together. either he's my gay best friend or the love of my life.
I didnt expect it either. But she was there and I had a boner, so i made it happen.
I just looked at the maps icon on my IPhone and "eR" was typed in the search address bar. I wonder if we ever got there.
Don't worry about it. I've taken so much Plan B, my uterus is purely for show now.
I told my mom I had sex with him and even SHE was proud. Now that's saying something.
We've already decided our costumes for next Halloween. She's going as Cookie Monster and I'm going as Elmo. She's just going to ask for Oatmeal Cookie shots, and I'm asking for Red-Headed Slut shots.
Dude, its January.
We're going to do the voices too.
U handed him a box of flavored condoms, winked, and slurred, "grape juice is her favorite."
I guess I'm in a committed relationship. We just had shot 1 of 3 of Gardasil. I'm now dead inside.
It was the textbook our-balls-touched-while-engaged-in-a-threesome-with-our-bosses-wife conversation.
It amazes and alarms me I'm not shocked to read that.
I took my exam the next day still drunk and failed, but I kno for a fact that I filled in the bubbles for my name perfectly
His wife made me pancakes and let me borrow a clean shirt. Should I drop his class or use this to my advantage
I'm rearranging all my life goals to become a billionaire by 28 and batman by 30. Not kidding.
We were coming but I found wine on my way out the door.
Its was awkward last year cuz in the middle of it her mom bust In the room with noise makers and champagne
Not only do I have a well-defined bite mark on my arm, but I also have a perfectly clear bruise of a handprint wrapped around my arm like a tribal tattoo. Thoughts on how that happened?
Randomize
