She kept saying I was her favorite Jonas brother, and for some reason, I was ok with that.
Someone just pulled taco bell tacos out of their purse in class....2 problems with here. 1) this class is nutrition 2) taco bell is not open this early.
He was sitting cross legged outside his tent repeatedly hitting the ground with a hammer and shouting 'this.is.a.good.idea.'
i found two dead squirrels on my front step this morning.. do you think they have something to do with my missing phone?
I'll have to explain it to you tonight when i call drunk. It will sound better
I had no where to run... The dumpster sounded like a good idea at the time
Sudue. BIG CUP LOTS OF NOMNOMD TUOSPY
just peed on the 7/11 floor and casually left. Omg so drunk
Im shrooming at the foot of a tree on top of a mountain. Feeling fly as fuckin socrates and bon iver.
We have a little not a lot. We already rolled a blunt and named him Ron.
i don't think i have enough personality to make it through this date sober.
Why are my jeans soaking wet and smell like chlorine??
Bc u told a stranger in the hotel "I have sinned' and made him get into the hotel fountain and "baptize u". I've got a vid
I'm pretty sure I naked in my first year of college more than I was as a baby.
It's your last night of vacation right? Be the Oprah of dick. And you get a dick... and you get a dick, and you get a dick!!!
Turns out dignity is priceless and Plan B costs $41.09
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