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• (604): View more from British Columbia

  a strip club that doesn't allow touching or asking for sex... whats the point?

  (604): View more from British Columbia

  unless her vagina can tell me my horoscope in sign language, I'm not going.

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• (617): View more from Massachusetts

  I just found out I have a small penis.

  (781): View more from Massachusetts

  Couldn't you tell by how you've NEVER had a girlfriend?

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• (317): View more from Indiana

  Hey, remember that girl at rocklobster you thought was hot but were to pussy to talk to? You were right, her boobs are fake and she gives the best head on the planet. Can you come pick me up?

  (812): View more from Indiana

  You're dead to me.

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• (616): View more from Michigan

  Do you think this abandoned cigarette has herpes? cuz I'm tempted.

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  These 19 Men’s Fashion Mistakes are Unforgivable, According to Women

  Read it at the TFLN blog
  

• (914): View more from New York

  Thanks for the menagerie of condoms on my desk

  (1-914): View more from New York

  It's the use of SAT words like that which make me want to use them on you

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• (480): View more from Arizona

  My valentine's day: watching The Notebook, and porn, eating chocolate, and ice cream. All while jacking off.

  (1-480): View more from Arizona

  Wow... you've managed to cover all of the sad girl stereotypes that exist.

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• (740): View more from Ohio

  I don't remember. I think I elluded to the fact that I would buy him a dildo for his birthday.

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• (502): View more from Kentucky

  I just sat through a State Farm mortgage Insurance commercial to watch a Trick Daddy video. Is this the target audience they are going for here?

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• (563): View more from Iowa

  I woke him up and he was mumbling something about it being moist, or he peed himself but it was okay.

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• 

  25 Cringeworthy Below the Pants Injuries

  Read it at the TFLN blog
  

• (714): View more from California

  You said you wanted to wrap his dick in a tortilla and make a spicy burrito. Let me just say, most girls don't have this hard of a time getting laid.

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• (818): View more from California

  Long story short he broke into a preschool and threw all their cones into a tree.

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• (309): View more from Illinois

  There's a baby duck in my toilet. Fuck you.

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• (773): View more from Illinois

  you're no funn. i shall go consult my friend vodka on this matter.

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• (574): View more from Indiana

  just like fucking own it. stare that cop in the eye and just keep masturbating "yeah motherfucker Im high as shit and this feels great"

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• (239): View more from Florida

  Yeah plus that night got so disgusting it's basically a repressed memory anyway

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