pedialite and red bull = repair kit
I've spent the last ten minutes rubbing glue sticks on the wall
I woke up this morning next to a stack of saltines & a txt from u saying "do it." it took me a second to remember wat was going on
Ima go for a jog. and I'm going to jog until I throw up a lung. then I'll crawl home.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'd feel sorry for him and his injury but it's an inconvenience for my vagina
He's sweet and rough. A wonderful contradiction. He's the starburst of sex.
When he texted me, I got a little wet. Until he asked me to get Jimmy Johns before I got to his house.
Thank you. Next to bondage, soft American Apparel t-shirts are the best things you've taught me about.
Oh dude I know. When something that's supposed stop pregnancies taste like chocolate something's up
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Much like Dre, I was forgotten about.
Have you ever just like not slept in so long that everything looks like a lava lamp?
bought a large fruitopia from McDonalds at 7:45 this morning. Spilled it on the ground. Cried. THAT hungover.
So he has moved up to a stage 5 clinger...Surprised he didn't try to lure you into bed with tacos, like he did last time
Yeah... akward. I don't want a round 2
I imagine you as a cat holding your burrito with two paws and cutely eating it
I feel asleep with my contacts in, with my arms wrapped around a bottle of vodka. Also... Do we have class today?
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