your butthole totally puckers for the ginge
windsor, ontario is like a poor man's amsterdam
no, it is just poor
I'm at a Rock of Love themed party. New high? New low? I can't tell.
Wait. Scratch that. It's not themed. These girls are just sluts.
Knee deep in strippers, everything is comped. will try hard to be there at 8. i promise.
im sitting in my room wearing my power rangers shirt watching a movie about a magical dragon. Ive totally forgotten what having a sex life is like.
She just got out of the car and said "hold on purse.. It's going to be a bumpy ride"
Just took a shot out of a used mini planter. Might die from the pesticides, but didnt want whoever took all of my shotglasses to think they won.
Just found a peacock feather in my car. Should I be the least bit concerned about this?
It's 4/20 of course I'm going to smoke in the portapotty and be ripped outta my mind at the lung cancer walk.
Can you tell me why Star Wars Burlesque is pulled up on my phone from last night?
I've decided that buying my first unused mattress has been my first major step into real adulthood.
My roommate has a sixth sense about my jerking off and walks in EVERY. SINGLE. TIME.
you were shouting "me peeing on him is the closest he'll EVER get to my vagina!"
He ate me out in the passenger seat of his Range Rover in a Tim Hortons parking lot. I could hear “oh canada” on the radio from a nearby school as I came. Most patriotic orgasm ever!
it is time to test the effects of half a loaf of bread and overconfidence on the human body
Randomize
